Working Mama. I am part of the work force. I have a job.
I find myself just staring off into space wondering how I got here. Then I find myself hiding in my closet wondering how to pull it off. Working, time with Hot Pastor, six kids, the house, ministry, writing this…
Books have been written, support groups formed, medication prescribed, and women have survived. This is not a new phenomenon; I’m just late to the party.
I get it if you laugh at me or if you’re thinking, “welcome to the real world Together Girl!” I’ve done the same thing when I listen to a mother of two complaining about all the papers her kids come home with, or how expensive her grocery bill is.
We are figuring this thing out as we go. I didn’t have time to read a manual or poll some friends. It happened fast. Hot Pastor has jumped right in to help with laundry. Our children have been forced into child labor. Apparently they believe that I could get arrested for making them dust furniture. Our routine has changed and I’m learning every week through my mistakes. Stumbling forward as my husband calls it.
Life is like that. Change comes and we have to make adjustments, like it or not. We learn as we go, right?
Some changes are easier than others. Some are just hard to accept while others are welcomed with cheers and parties. Sometimes the hardest part is accepting change as the new reality, the new normal.
That cheesy phrase “bloom where you’re planted” comes to mind. Sorry.
There’s truth in the cheese. When we fight the uninvited changes in our lives, we miss what God wants to do in us and through us- the blooming.
As I was praying last weekend about God calling me to write and my one day transformation as a working mother, I wanted to know how they fit together. I was expecting to be writing devotions, not IEP’s (special education paperwork). It was so clear the dream of writing. I received so much confirmation, and now I have to fight so hard to make time for it.
Something became so clear to me. Until now, I have never been able to relate to working women. It’s not that being at home with my kids, especially during the home school years, wasn’t work. Oh baby, it’s work! But now, I have a connection to so many more of you that are pulling two shifts- the public sector and the home front.
Another thing I heard from God is that he is still passionate about teaching me to abide. Without those quiet moments at home, I have struggled with my intimacy with Jesus. He is asking me to stop living from quiet to quiet, and to learn to quiet my heart during the chaos. Connection in the midst of it all.
In him we live, and move, and have our being. Acts 17:28
God is saying, “in me you teach, and cook, and shop at Kroger. In me you parent, and work out, and help with homework. In me you clean, and drive, and love your family.”
All of it in his presence. That was his answer to my question. How does this all fit together? The blog, the IEP’s, my home and family in his presence. It’s not easy for me. I tend to “organize” my day. Work time. Dinner time. Date time. Prayer time. Study time. Worship time.
My desire is for his presence to be like a vapor that penetrates my life at work and at home, the air that I breathe.
God is not just waiting for me in the quiet moments alone. He surrounds me. I just have to open my eyes to see his glory in it all.