When I was expecting our first child, we lived in a small, two-bedroom, one bath house in North Carolina. This was during the days when maternity clothes resembled circus tents and on top of that I was sporting hand-me-down ones from my friend’s mom who had a child late in life. 

That summer, we had some friends who needed a place to live in between jobs. I’ll call them Bob and Betty to protect their identity. We were all happy in our little house. It was almost like being in college, except the fact that I was seven months pregnant. I once had to pee outside because Bob was in the bathroom, but that was funny compared to what I’m about to share.

I was home alone one day and had to run into the kitchen to grab a snack. I was wearing one of those tent shirts. Let me rephrase that. I was only wearing one of those tent shirts. Suddenly, Bob came in the door! After both our faces turned ten shades of red, and Bob went back to work without the lunch he had come home for, I sat in my room feeling super awkward. I’m thinking he probably still has disturbing dreams. Sorry Bob.

You know what I’ve learned about friendship? There are some awkward moments that need to happen, and our friendships will be better for them. Not the maternity top moments. That did not strengthen my friendship with Bob. I’m talking about those moments when we ask the deeper questions that take our friendships to a new place. 

So many times, our connections are fun and comfortable, but could cross over to much more if we risk a little awkwardness. Answering questions about our marriage, deepest fears, and spiritual doubts leave us feeling uncomfortable. At first. But after that awkward moment when the question is hanging in the air, after it makes its way into our hearts, comfort comes. 

When someone cares enough to want to know us more, to share in our struggles and our pain, we are comforted and relieved. As a friend carefully constructs questions that uncover our dreams and joys, its as if they have just engineered a bridge connecting their hearts to ours. 

So many things connect us in relationships- laughter and inside jokes, life experiences. Those things create a footbridge between us, but the more we dare to share, the deeper we go, the connection between becomes something much stronger. It is a wonderfully engineered, super reinforced bridge that links us together in amazingly new ways.


I remember at a staff retreat, we created a space in our busy lives to really connect with each other. I’ll never forget sharing 
some dreams and hearing the insight and comments of close friends, confirming what I felt God had for me. Was it crazy hard to carve out a weekend away? Without a doubt! Was it a little uncomfortable sharing our hearts? Yep. Worth it? Absolutely!

How strong are your bridges? Will you take a risk and ask hard questions? Will you risk some awkward moments? I know it’s scary, but deeper connections are waiting for you. 

James 5:16

The Message (MSG)
16-18 Make this your common practice: Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you can live together whole and healed.